I’m failing harder, better & faster...
I LOVE DANCE… and thank goodness I do because that passion is what motivates me to make it through the very uncomfortable experience of pursuing it as a full time thing.
There’s a lot of mistakes and failures that come along with wading out into uncharted personal territory and those experiences can bring up difficult emotions like shame, embarrassment, and feeling like I’m not enough.
I’ve finally gotten to the point, however, where I separate myself from those negative emotions and look at the experiences as a good thing because they mean I am doing something new, growing, and learning.
Here’s some recent failures I’ve had:
Had a rocky choreography class because I didn’t take the time beforehand to think about how to explain in micro-detail some difficult steps in the beginning
Business negotiation fell through because I was not assertive and did not effectively demonstrate the value I could add
Had a first time student feel overworked during their private lesson and they did not book another
Held back my own business growth because I had anxiety over a few key tasks I was putting off
The list could go on but here’s my main point: each of those experiences taught me what NOT to do, showed me gaps in my knowledge, and revealed some important things that I needed to pay more attention to than I thought.
If everything was smooth sailing, I would never grow. When I make a mistake, it’s painful, and that pain is a signal that I need to pay attention, do an after-action report, and figure out how to never make that mistake again. I get better through the process. When I’m failing, I’m learning and growing.
I’ve started telling myself this:
Fail faster.
The faster I can try more new strategies/approaches/experiences, the faster I discover what works and what doesn’t, and the faster I can build my skills. That means I’m gonna be failing more often, but it also means I’m gonna level up way faster than if I spent all my time trying to avoid the pain and embarrassment of failing in front of other people.
Ultimately, a failure doesn’t determine my worth as a dancer/teacher/entrepreneur any more than a single success does. I don’t view failures as some big day-ruining thing anymore (not that I even have time to wallow like that) - I just look at them as part of the process and move on with my life.
Don’t let fear of failure or looking dumb hold you back.
If you fall short and land on your face, you’re still way ahead of everyone who’s too afraid to even try.